Love Letters from Former Nuns: Ginny

Ginny is not a haunted house; therefore, she would like to know why she keeps getting ghosted.

Ginny’s family believes that Ginny does not talk to boys in her post-nunnery life. Ginny is here to say that she does talk to boys, they just don’t always respond. And that is in no way her fault. Ginny is a charming young woman who has a lot to offer in the way of a relationship. Parents love Ginny because she is a low-key nerd who can cook better than your grandmother (but not better than her grandmother). However, she also has a sense of self-worth, and will not be giving her time to any boy who does not value it.

When Ginny walked into the college radio station headquarters wondering if she and her DJ training partner were about to have a meet-cute that would blossom into a relationship, she was not being serious and was not expecting Scott to be so attractive. Scott was lean and muscular, so looked like he could romantically throw Ginny on her extra-long twin size dorm bed should the occasion arise. He had huge blue eyes, and Ginny is a sucker for blue eyes. Ginny thought Scott was cool because he played guitar and could do impressions old-timey radio hosts.

DJ training was three weeks long. During the first week, Ginny and Scott sent each other playlists. Ginny tried to like bluegrass music for Scott, but she honestly believes that no one can enjoy bluegrass music and anyone who says they can is lying. The second week, they texted nonstop and sent each other ugly selfies until Scott decided he wanted to see Ginny’s face in person outside of the radio station and invited her to grab lunch with him. Scott did not eat. Ginny was not cool with that. The only thing worse than someone not eating at all during a lunch is someone eating a salad while you are five tacos deep and seriously considering a sixth. Ginny decided Scott should work a little harder to impress her. Scott did not text her at all. When they saw each other in person again, he claimed his phone had broken. Ginny did not believe him, and the flirtations were terminated. It was probably for the best. Scott lived on the opposite side of campus, so a relationship never could have worked.

After a year spent going through the college transfer application process (because of reasons other than the Scott disaster), Ginny needed to blow off some steam and was looking for a meaningless summer fling. Nick presented himself on June eighth. Nick was ripped. He lifts, bro, and it shows. Ginny’s friends dubbed Nick “back boy” because of his impressive musculature. Nick has slightly squinty blue eyes. Did he have anything in common with Ginny? No. Did Ginny spend a large portion of time thinking his sister was actually his girlfriend considering how close their relationship is? Yes. But Nick was a warm, semi-attractive body who lived near Ginny and she was down for whatever.

Nick was Ginny’s brother’s friend first, so Ginny did what any sister would do in her situation: she forced her brother to invite Nick kayaking with her and one of her brother’s other friends. Nick barely said two words to Ginny the entire time they were out on the water. Once they docked and were hanging out on the beach, they got the conversation ball rolling with a discussion of movies. Nick started nerding out over Star Wars. Ginny has never seen a single Star War. So what did Ginny do when she could not talk about the movie Nick was talking about? She shifted focus to The Godfather. This probably was not the correct thing to do, but Nick had taken three days between each text before responding to Ginny, so her patience was running low. After kayaking, Ginny continued to make an ill-advised effort to make Nick her boo, but he became a ghost instead.

James and Ginny met while interning at the same museum, a place Ginny has described as the pearl in Connecticut’s oyster. James was a lanky, blonde haired nerd in the way that has recently become cool. He had just returned from studying abroad in Greece, and he liked that Ginny had just transferred from his college’s rival school. Beyond being physically attractive, he and Ginny were intellectually matched, a trait Ginny appreciated because she is easily bored when she’s either the smartest or the dumbest person in a room. James was someone Ginny could have a conversation with and then completely lose focus in the conversation because she got lost in his eyes. James had an identical twin who also had blue eyes. Although they are identical and Ginny probably could have been talking to the twin without ever knowing the difference, she still attests that James had more kindness in his eyes and more warmth in his smile.

James responded to Ginny’s texts promptly, a common courtesy but one Ginny was not used to. Because they actually had common interests, their conversations were far more interesting. In one exchange about The Princess Bride, Ginny was direct in telling James she is a sucker for blue eyes, hoping he would get the hint regarding his own eyes. Whether he did or not remains to be seen. They had a witty banter going in their messages and at the museum. When James wanted to discuss the museum’s art in preparation for his museum guide test, he and Ginny continued the banter at a local coffee shop. They discussed the museum’s collection for five minutes, and then discussed everything but the collection. Ginny thought it went well. James seemed disappointed when he had to leave, and Ginny told him not to be a stranger. Ginny resolved to wait for James to text her before she texted him. She stuck to her promise. And James fell off the face of the earth.

If Scott and Nick are reading this, Ginny would like you to know you blew it. If James is reading this, Ginny has not closed your door.

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